Monday, February 23, 2009

How Are You Feeling?

Pretty much everyone--everyone--asks me, when they see me, "How are you feeling?" I actually appreciate the concern. A lot.

It kind of feels like a let-down to tell them, as I have been because it's true, "Just fine, actually, thanks." No--really it isn't true. I spend most winters sneezing and coughing and hacking around a sore throat, with my hands chapped and raw from the sanitising solution at Starbucks. I don't really know how I've escaped all that this winter, but if I were going to be really honest, I should have been going around saying, "I feel great, thanks."

(Nobody gets that enthusiastic about anything in New England, though.)

Anyway, it might come as something of a relief to all involved that, having gone through most of the cancer treatments with shamelessly few effects, I can now say in answer to the "How are you?" question, "Kind of horrible, actually."

It would appear that the cold/flu thing I've been dodging all winter has finally caught up with me. Meanwhile, tamoxifen seems to be going pretty well, except that it is refusing to allow me to sleep. I don't think I've had a full night of sleep since I started taking it. Which might explain why the cold/flu thing caught up with me, I guess. Also hot flashes. Those are weird, people. I really hope I don't have them (and sleeplessness) for the ensuing five years I'm on this stuff . . .

But otherwise? I'm feeling great, thanks.


Cliff said...

It's kind of liberating being that honest with people. Not quite transparent, but honest.

And yes, Donne is wonderful. We're studying his devotions right now in 17th Century English Lit. I had a rough time with the Satyres, but either I finally got the hang of his language, or his other stuff we've been studying is just easier.

And though two incidents may co-occur, I don't believe in purposeless co-incidents.

But that's just me.

Elizabeth said...

Oh Jenn! I'm so sorry that you're feeling awful. I've had a hard time sleeping recently and it's the worst! Especially when you're sick. I hope you feel better soon. We're praying for you!