Thursday, February 04, 2010

Is THIS Ironic?

Please tell me it is, or I may have to return my college diploma. A lot of people paid a lot of money for that thing.

First, some backstory:

The summer I returned to the States from London, I locked myself out of a friend's guestroom. I locked myself out of my car . . . twice. I locked myself out of the house--I think it was twice on that one, too. One of the times I was wearing my living-history-museum costume and had to walk about a mile down the road to find a friend who could get through the window three stories above the ground. At least it was summer. (Although let me tell you, that walk in that costume was pretty sweltering!)

After that, my parents had an extra key made for the house and we found a hiding spot for it, and I've been set, ever since. The hiding spot's not that convenient, but it's way more convenient than getting locked out.

So this morning, Oscar and I got up for our usual Walk and when I pulled the door shut after me, I made sure the doorknob was locked. Normally I also make sure my keys are in my pocket, but they're always in my pocket, and maybe I was still a little asleep. Anyway, I didn't check this time. But when we got back from our Walk and I put my hand in my coat pocket, my heart sank down to somewhere below the brick walkway. What about the extra key? you ask? Well, the extra key was sitting on the table right inside the door I was trying to open. And my usual keys were clearly (and unusually) hanging up on the hook designed for them in the hallway.

That's not the ironic part. It's the "go figure" part.

This is another "go figure" part:

The reason that extra key was in the house was because I had already used it in the last week or so, and had just been too lazy to put it back in its hiding place after I had finished with it.

This (I think) is the ironic part:

The time that I had used it before? My usual keys were actually in my pocket--I just hadn't been able to find them in there what with the kleenex and Oscar's poop-bags (no poop in them, by the way--I don't put those ones back in my pocket, in case you were worried) and receipts and stuff. It would be more ironic if the same thing were true this time, and I inconvenienced my Next-Door Neighbours and paid out for a locksmith and my usual keys were in my pocket the whole time, but they weren't. All that stuff was valid. What wasn't valid was why the extra key was inside in the first place. I hadn't even needed to use it that time. But now, when I did need to, it was patiently sitting inside for no good reason at all.

Isn't that ironic? No, you know what? If it isn't? I don't wanna know.


Mary Anne said...

I do think that is ironic. But I'm wondering how you ever got in the house this time?!?

Jennwith2ns said...

I inconvenienced my neighbours and paid out for a locksmith. I just didn't have the keys in my pocket the whole time.

Barry Pike said...

The "living-history-museum costume" part of the story has comedic potential...better file that experience away for a future short story or something.

K. said...

Yeah! I'm not the only one! I'm so glad :) I used to have a few spare keys at good friends when I was still single. Now I am married and have had to go out to where my husband was twice, and had to wait outside for him for an hour in the hot summer sun when both me and my girlfriend who was staying with me went out for a walk with the dog and both of us didn't take our keys with us...(knowing my husband was leaving shortly after).I also left the keys on the street once while taking care of a thorn in the paw of a dog. And... got it back! Which is the miracle part. My way to deal with it is to think how many times I actually get away with it and how few times this absentmindedness that falls upon me some days causes actual trouble...

K. said...

Anyway, I think it is hilarious... Has nothing to do with college diploma's. Isn't it what professors are said to do all the time?

Jennwith2ns said...

Barry--oh trust me. I have oodles of stories like that one.

Krina--the return of the diploma was more about whether or not I actually understand the concept of irony, rather than my keys. The keys, I fear, are a lost cause. ;)

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